The windows were rolled down, but that could not cool the heat rising in my cheeks as I began to blush. He had is arm around my shoulder and he was singing “Brick House” to me in between my bursts of laughter. I felt happy sitting in his passenger seat as he drove me home from playing frisbee. Every part of my skin glowed beneath his touch.
These days were few and could not carry us to the winter. The cold took away what we hadb ut not the memories that continued to linger. Regret was all that pulsed through my veins, yelling at me for not taking the chance while I had it. I waited for the slightest bit of hope that might rise with the grass and the sun.
The hope that came was not the one that I had previously wished for. I was told that I could be “next” in line. I was told that it could be my turn once he was done with his current fling. Everything said to me that night washed out the person I once knew.
The guy who once made me feel special and feel like there was no one but me was now a stranger in my eyes.
I carried that hole in my heart. I convinced myself that he was still the same, but his actions proved me wrong. I was hurt and confused. He toyed with me over and over again, and I kept falling back on that little hope I once had.
Logic had always been my friend but this time failed to keep me away from the hurt, the hurt that others who you thought you loved caused you.
I could no longer bear the weight of the feelings I had, so I knew it was time for me to move on. Time healed the wounds that still slightly sting every time I see him. I cannot help myself from still getting that fluttery feeling I get when he looks in my eyes. But I will never feel for him the way I felt back when summer grazed upon our skin and nights were filled with frisbee and snow cones.
He will never be for me what he was. But there will always be a piece of my heart’s puzzle that only he will fit.